One of many lies

It's the lie we tell ourselves as parents and the lie we tell other parents and the lie we tell our children. We're raising you to be independent. But none of us is an island. Humans weren't meant to stand alone. Perhaps nobody explained the true meaning of the idea to me...independence. But I see it as needing nobody, being self-reliant.

I want that, to a certain extent, for each of you. But the more I cruise the internet and read into other people's lives the more I do not want you feeling the isolation that seems so rampant out there. It's like an epidemic. It knows no social class, no ethnicity, no age and no gender. Sure I want you to know how to sort laundry, cook hamburger helper and pay your bills. But you shouldn't think that once you hit 18 you're on your own with EVERYTHING. I want you to have a job. I want you to strive for a skill of some kind...a skill that means something to you. I want you to set goals for your life and your future. I want you to have dreams and experience change. But no one should grieve or falter alone. No one should feel lost or lonely. No one. That's not independence and anyone who thinks it is is just looking for a reason to bail on you.

I'm not going to bail. So by all means get out there while you still have the drive and the energy to see it all. Come home anytime. Start over as often as you want. You'll be doing the cooking, cleaning and laundry when you do...just remember that.

Love,
Mom